I can’t believe people have time to do this
how cute! look at all these happy faces! but remember folks, this cob may be smiling at you, but corn doesn’t feel pain! phew! it’s a delicious and humane snack for everyone to enjoy!
xoxo, fyc
What a cool invention, although here at fuckyeahcorn we think there’s no sadder sight than a shorn cob. Don’t they look so dejected? It’s a great time saver but when you’ve got some minutes to spare, try to give each and every kernel the love it deserves. Think about how much it’s had to go through to get to your kitchen in one piece, all the way from germination. It’s truly miraculous! Don’t let the wonders of life pass you by, but remember to make the corn decisions that make you the happiest and most fulfilled personally!
Love,
your friends at fuckyeahcorn
CORN THINS are today’s healthy, delicious, and cost-effective corn snack brought to you by your close friends at fuckyeahcorn!
HYBRID CORN: advantages and disadvantages
these corn cobs are a lovely sight to see! However, they are perfect examples of corn to steer clear of!
The corn of the left is a B73 ear, which is an experimental hybrid meant to be sweet, but that turned out very bitter. Keep your eye out for ears that are thick, short, and the same width throughout with a pointed, bare end.
The middle corn is an unsuccessful ear from a successful hybrid. This hybrid produces large ears of corn with the same flavor as its smaller counterpart. However, every crop of this particular hybrid wields about 1.25% inedible corn. It’s not dangerous to eat, however the flavor is as bitter as the B73. You can prevent yourself from eating bitter hybrid corn by checking the kernels for the telltale signs: the kernels will be bright yellow but many of them will have a darker colored dent in the center. The bottoms of the kernels, where they attach to the corn, will be similarly dark. Your chances of getting an inedible ear of hybrid corn are pretty low, but they’re higher if you follow fuckyeahcorn’s advice and eat corn every day!
The right ear is an Mo17 ear. This is an unsuccessful hybrid, characterized by nearly tasteless corn with kernels that have very little bondage to the shaft. This corn to stay away from can be gleaned by the crooked lines of the kernels, the thin ear, and the bony end.
None of these three corns will cause any damage if you accidentally eat them! They’re just not as delicious as other types of corn. Our lovely American corn growers do their best to keep ineffective corn out of stock, but cut them a little bit of slack! Remember that the kernels can’t be seen until the corn is husked, and many of the people who can spot a bad ear are out of the equation by the time the husk is penetrated. It’s your job as a corn-sumer to know what corn is best!
Keep your eye out for the highest quality corn you can find, but remember to always have fun!
love,
your friends at fuckyeahcorn
Carl Sandburg - The Laughing Corn
There was a high majestic fooling
Day before yesterday in the yellow corn.
And day after to-morrow in the yellow corn
There will be high majestic fooling.
The ears ripen in late summer
And come on with a conquering laughter,
Come on with a high and conquering laughter.
The long-tailed blackbirds are hoarse.
One of the smaller blackbirds chitters on a stalk
And a spot of red is on its shoulder
And I never heard its name in my life.
Some of the ears are bursting.
A white juice works inside.
Cornsilk creeps in the end and dangles in the wind.
Always—I never knew it any other way—
The wind and the corn talk things over together.
And the rain and the corn and the sun and the corn
Talk things over together.
Over the road is the farmhouse.
The siding is white and a green blind is slung loose.
It will not be fixed till the corn is husked.
The farmer and his wife talk things over together.
